Hatred: A Heavy Burden

This past Christmas season, my family and I read suggested scriptures from an Advent Calendar. One night, we read this entry: “Jesus came to lift our burdens. One of the heaviest burdens we carry is that of hate. In teaching us to forgive, the Lord set us free.” This season, I came to know just how that true that really is.

Because of some events surrounding Thanksgiving, I had already been reflecting on the many ways I needed to remove the beam from my own eye instead of trying to remove the mote from everyone else's. It seemed that I kept catching myself committing similar sins to those I'd been criticizing in others. They may have been different in the way they manifested, but underneath the surface, they were the same. As I saw this, it became easier to forgive others and my heart began to feel more of this freedom.

However, the feeling was challenged mid-season as I found myself once again facing this burden of hatred in some form. Emotions like resentment, desire for revenge and the fulfillment of angry desires in reaction to being wronged by others swirled around me and at times even entered my own heart. Then I read this entry, along with these scriptures.

Matthew 18:21-22 is the scripture where Jesus says we should forgive those who wrong us repeatedly. Not just seven times, but seventy times seven. As I explained to my daughter that night that the numbers were symbols for an infinity of forgiveness, my heart was pricked and I knew that forgiveness would always be required of me and others no matter how many times we were wronged.

Then I read Matthew 6:14-15, which says, “For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your Heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” My own deep need to be forgiven became very real to me again and I began to remember how free it feels to just forgive. I let go and enjoyed the Spirit of Christmas to a greater degree after that.

Yet another time near the end of the season, I felt wronged again. This time it was personal. I was angry. I needed time. I needed to experience all the emotions flowing through me and then, I had to humble myself in prayer. I had to ask the Lord to do what I could not do: help me to love the one whom I felt had wronged me. And as I prayed and wept, thoughts of my own hypocrisy came back to me again along with these words: “[The person who wronged you] is trying the best they can. They have flaws just like you. Their flaws are just different than yours. But in their heart they have no malice toward you. They are doing the best they can.” It seemed as though a window opened in my mind into the life of this person. New understanding came about the way they might see things and I wept all the more as my heart was released from the chains of hatred. I made amends, and after that, it seemed as though I was soaring through my days, free to concern myself with my own dreams, the joys of my family, and when necessary, the beams in my own eye, rather than being weighed down by my hatred of someone else's mote.

I'm so thankful for the way the Lord teaches me when I allow Him to. I'm so thankful for the way He changes my heart when I ask Him to. Truly, God's Son is the greatest gift ever given in all of eternity. What He can do for you and me is simply amazing.