Charity Never Faileth

I had several opportunities to give and observe service to others this past week. For a while now, I've been in the process of organizing my time and household so that I could keep up with everything and not feel behind all the time. Amazingly, I feel I have succeeded, with the Lord's help, of course. This week I found that offering service to others is so much easier when I am caught up on my personal and family responsibilities. It made me wonder what the Lord expects of us in terms of giving service to others. Should I never serve outside my family unless I am caught up at home? I don't think that sounds right. So what is the right balance between service to others and our own responsibilities?

My perspective about how much service I give has improved as I have taken on this project of keeping up at home. I've come to understand that while my family members are responsible for their own portion, the cleaning of my home is actually a service to them (and it helps me, too). But it's not just cleaning that I feel I need to keep up with. It is teaching my daughter right from wrong, making sure there are good influences in her life, teaching her the scriptures and making sure all family members are communicating well and taking care of one another. I won't list everything I do here. I'm sure you moms out there know what responsibilities I am referring to.

I believe it was President Thomas S. Monson who said, “Don't ever let the solving of a problem become more important than the loving of a person.” Priorities are so important here. I don't think striking a balance is going to be the same every day or week or month or year. It will just vary from time to time. Sometimes sacrificing your own to do list in favor of serving someone else is what the Lord would have you do. And sometimes He would have you focus your service within the walls of your own home before taking your efforts outside it.

I have found that as I am sure to make prayer and scripture study a part of my regular morning routine, then I am able to listen to the voice of the Lord's Spirit in my heart. He shows me what areas need my attention. I read 1 Corinthians 13 this morning. This includes the famous passage of scripture “faith, hope, and love, but the greatest of these is love.” I prefer the KJV, which keeps the more original translation “charity” rather than love. Charity is love, after all.

Giving service is not really about a list of tasks you have done. Charity is an attitude of Christlike love. Verse 3 says, “And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.” We can run ourselves ragged performing acts of service, but it doesn't matter if we don't have charity, or true love, in our hearts as we do them.

The important thing as we decide how much service to give is to keep ourselves in communication with our Heavenly Father. We will feel peace when He is pleased with our efforts. If there is something He would have us to do, His Spirit will whisper it to our hearts. So my first responsibility, no matter how busy I am otherwise, is to pray and study His word enough each day so that I can hear His voice. Doing so will also help me to develop an attitude of charity in all the things I do, and remember that, “Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not, charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. Charity never faileth,” (1 Cor. 13:4-8).

Communication is the Key

We talk about all different kinds of keys in our culture. Keys open doors and opportunities and unlock power or success. We even go so far as to tell our significant other “You have the key to my heart.” Something that has been brought to my attention repeatedly over the years is that communication is the key to life. Perhaps it could even be called the secret of happiness.

Without question, every single time there has been a problem in my marriage, it has been because of a breakdown in communication. The same goes for any friendship problem I've had, as well as most of my challenges with children. Lack of communication is also the source of stagnation in my spiritual life.

The first and best way to find an answer to any problem, is, of course, prayer. What is prayer? Communication with our Father in Heaven. If Satan can distract us from prayer in any way, he will try. I cannot count the number of times I've thought, Okay, time for morning prayer, and then on my way toward the spot where I was going to kneel, I have stopped to return an object to its rightful place, then seen the mountain of laundry waiting to be folded, then felt the pressure of the days activities and time creeping up on me, answered the phone and before I know it, I am in the van driving on my first errand, never having uttered a word of prayer. Needless to say, I pray a lot when I'm driving, with my eyes open of course.

I really believe two of Satan's best tools are distraction and lack of communication. The latter can be brought about in so many ways, including our own pride or feeling of hopelessness. But we need to remember that God is our Father. Do you think He would send us here without setting up a way that we could communicate with him when we need to? He wants us to pray to Him for help! Not just in generalities, but with specifics. If we pray specifically, He will answer us specifically.

And as far as communicating with other people, take courage! People are people and as long as you are being respectful, you can usually find that some misunderstanding has occurred, or that a person has much more depth to them than you previously thought. Communication brings the discovery that most of us do actually have good intentions and are doing the best we can. Most of us aren't trying to hurt anyone else. So, pray for humility and take the time and effort it takes to communicate! It is so worth it. Many times, it is the key that unlocks the door to happiness.