Parents, Children, and Christlike Love

It is sad to me that so many parent/child relationships end up in shambles when the child reaches adulthood. Pondering this has caused me to wonder whether I am already doing things that are leading my daughter toward the can't-wait-to-get-away-from-my-parents attitude so many teenagers have. Our family is focusing on Respect this month and I have begun to realize just how disrespectfully I speak to my daughter at times.

Too often, we are our own worst selves when in the presence of family members because they are the ones with whom we feel the most comfortable. This is unfortunate because these are the people we should treat with the most respect and the best manners of all.

I've wondered what causes this bitter annoyance or resentment that many people have for their parents. Perhaps one of the causes is the basic nature of the relationship. Other than marriage, it is the most challenging relationship in this life in terms of treating one another in a Christlike manner.

We grow up from infancy with our moms and dads. We observe them in every life situation. We see their reactions, attitudes, hypocrisies and flaws. Other than a spouse, there is no other person about whom we know so much. We know their flaws, mistakes, and sins all too well. Unfortunately, we may not have grown up seeing or hearing any of the regret they felt for their mistakes. I think of the times I mentally scold myself for saying one thing and doing another in front of my daughter. She does not hear my mental scolding; she only hears what I say and sees what I do.

The scriptures say, “Of you it is required to forgive all” and “Judge not lest ye be judged.” These relationships in which so many of a person's flaws are blatantly visible create one of the ultimate tests of our faith in this life.

Will we forgive our parents for the flaws we've seen in them for a lifetime and treat them with kindness? Will we willingly serve them with the same Christlike, respectful attitude with which we serve those who are our neighbors, but perhaps are not as familiar to us?

I hope I can improve and show more respect to all of my family members. I've found that the more communicating and seeking to understand I try to do, the better able I am to treat my family members with Christlike love. Families are part of God's plan for our lives. When we face Him in the end, I feel that the way we have handled our family relationships will be very high on the list of things to be reviewed.